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March 25 2014 2 25 /03 /March /2014 02:35

Ahh... now this is the list of my favorite tippers... ones that I remember and talk about after a hard days work for pennies in a restaurant.  I've been nice before but I see no reason to be nice now...   So lets begin.... hey.. you may know one of these guys... or gals..

 

John Hughes... Apparently no one ever taught you how to tip.  I mean seriously.. $9.33 on $86.17... perhaps you were dropped on your head as a child and you are half retarded.  Whatever...

 

Richard King... You know the short name for Richard is Dick.. and you definately made Dick King by leaving only ... wait.. $0 on $160.91.  King might not be a strong enough title for you sir.

 

Salvador Jaime.  Can't trust someone with two first names... $8.00 on $94.12 ... and it was half price night... you guys got tons of left overs.. perfect service.. and did that?  Fall off a bridge...

 

Scott Allen Walton thinks that 10% is a great tip.  I believe he even complimented me on my service.  $5 on $50.12.. You are the man... lame..

 

Jordan D. Evans had all his alcohol bought for him.. I would be happy as hell!  Free booze.. hell yeah.. I'll tip this waiter awesome!  $4.00 on $41.03... that is pretty weak bro..

 

Joyce, Steven, and Valena Turner.. cheap ass must run in the damn family... $116 tab.. 3 way split... $1.75 in nickles and dimes...   enjoy the 7th level of hell.  All of you.

 

Fredric Lloyd.... $6 on $101.51 is pretty sick bro.. I mean you know what I could do with that?  I could go crazy with that much money... if I lived in Nigeria.  Screw that...

 

Hilaria R. Rios.. Who the fuck names their kid Hilaria... was having her hilarious?  I also thought it was hilarious that she left $4 on $53.91 after scratching out the grat...

 

Richard Lopez.. another person named Dick... $46.50 after I took care of your kids food and all of your desserts.. what does the big Dick do?  Leaves me a five spot.  Dick..

 

J. Jackson.. they were so nice.  Came up to me and thanked me for my excellent service and being nice to his family.  So nice.. Why is it that people believe verbal tips can pay my bills?  $10 in cash on $140..  In my heart I felt so great for the compliment..  haha.. not what so ever.

 

Kelly Hodges.. simple.. $111.50... and she left me $8.  4 letter word.. think of it.. think of it... there.. You got it.. C***

 

Johnny Trevino and his family I thought was gonna be awesome.. right off the bat ordering expensive stuff.. joking around and all.. I was happy to wait on these people.  Man did I want to kick them all in the taint when I saw the $25 on $226.46. 

 

Stephen Barton left me a big fat $5 dollar bill on $88.97.  Damn cockknocker... (watching Chasing Amy as I wrote that)

 

Andrea C. Deweese.  Deweese.. interesting last name.. something simple to spell.. something any idiot could do.  Oh.. idiot also left me $2 on $48.50.

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December 4 2013 3 04 /12 /December /2013 20:33

          Having been in the service industry for a very long time, (too long I sometimes think) I’ve seen how customer services in corporate establishments have no mettle.  I know to keep a good reputable business you need to keep your customers happy because word of mouth advertising is crucial.  The tragic downfall to this is that many people try and successfully work the system to their own ends, hurting business and aggravating the staff.

Restaurants
          If you have ever waited tables you have probably got a guest that complains simply in the hopes to get something free.  I take genuine complaints on a daily basis and typically I rectify it before having to get a manager involved because I am good at my job.  I do send a manager over to be sure they are happy but I do the leg work to get it right for them.

The False complaints are what really irk me… the ones that you just can’t fix because truly nothing is wrong.  Repeat guests will complain about the establishment not having something and get mad, when last week they did the exact same thing.  If you point this out to them they call corporate and get your ass lit up.  Management won’t back you up… corporate will not either… so you apologize and comp off something they get simply because the establishment doesn’t carry something they want.  Sometimes they want something that the establishment has NEVER carried and they get upset.  These people are bad for business… they tell other people like them to come in and it begins a terrible cycle of my cousins…  You know it is true.  One day I heard this…

“If I had ordered that, I would not have to pay for it.  I just complain all the time here and they take it off.”

 

http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n97/drifterz01/Oprahmeem.jpg

Love the fact that she stated in a show once that it is acceptable to tip 10%.

 

Screw that bitch…
Both of them...


Phone/Electric Companies
I’ve had Sprint PCS since I was 16 years old.  That’s like 17 years I have had the same service and the same number.  Overall, I am quite happy with my service… but there was a time I was not.  There have been times in the past that my service was horrible on the delivery side of it down to the customer service assistance (due to the phone reps apparently being in India).  There have been times when I shopped for new service elsewhere and the moment it was clear to Sprint I wanted to leave… they turned on the charm.  Free upgrades, free month or two of service… anything to make me happy.  I didn’t exploit this… I didn’t go back after a year and try this b.s. again to get another hook up.  Some people on the other hand do… all the time and you know what?  It works!!  Electric companies aren’t as easy of a pushover as the others but they will bend over backwards to keep you if you plan to leave… then pull the same crap that pissed you off in the first place.

Small Business
I love small businesses because they know their worth.  They will work with you on how you want something done to attempt to keep your business but they also know when to cut their losses.  I worked for a guy once who owned his own successful Restaurant/Bar and he was also the GM.  There was a repeat guest… let us call him D.B., and D.B. would always make little complaints about things with every visit.  After three months my GM was so fed up with D.B. complaining, that after D.B.’s complaint that the last waitress entered his tip 14 cents lower than he wrote and how it messed up his books.  My good ole GM walked away… grabbed a tray and some boxes, returned to the table, and proceeded without request of D.B. or his family packed all their food up for them, informed them he was comping their meal, and that if he ever saw them in his restaurant again he would call the cops.  I love that story!


Personally I think small business is the way to go.  Expand all you want but keep the small business mindset when managing your customers and employees.  Corporations absorb losses from stupid people and don’t bat an eye but small businesses profit more from not taking that kind of crap.  Also their staff is happier and the customers you want will spread the word to good people.  Shop small business as much as you can… Support the little guys!


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December 2 2013 1 02 /12 /December /2013 12:00

          This is a place where I put interactions between guests and either myself, my friends, or just random people I run into online or at bars.  I tend to hang around with a lot of restaurant employees at bars so we are always swapping "horror" stories.  Here is a few of my favorite interactions over time....

 

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Server 1:  How often do you wash your hair?

Busser: Every day usually... sometimes I miss a day on the hair.

Server 1:  Oh, you are doing it all wrong...  the chemicals and stuff in shampoo is bad for your hair.

Busser: Really? 

Server 2:  <is looking at both like they are crazy>

Server 1:  Yeah... I mean I only wash my hair ... once a month.. sometimes twice.

Server 2:  Once a month?

Server 1:  Yeah...

Server 2:  <walks away and spreads the tale...>

 

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Guest:  There is a bone in my food.

Server:  There is a bone in your steak?

Guest:  Yes, there is... see?

Server:  Actually I don't... a bone in skirt steak is... well almost impossible.

Guest:  It's there...

Server:  I'll get just get you another order... I'll have them check it for...bones...

 

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Guest Call Ahead Request:  Table for 20 at 8PM Saturday night.  Requesting back room so we can bring someone who has had recent surgery and can't have physical contact with people.

 

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Guest:  I'll take two Vodka Cranberries and one Rum and Pineapple.

Bartender: <makes the drinks> Here ya go.

Guest:  You put too much Pineapple in that one...

Bartender: Tell me when to stop <makes another one>

Guest:  Well you should give me that one because you messed it up.

Bartender:  We don't give out free drinks.

Guest:  Well the customer is always right so you should give it to me.

Bartender:  You may be right but we don't give away free drinks <chucks drink in the trash>

 

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Guest: Can I get a cup for this? <pointing at a full margarita>

Server: Heheh... right.. sorry I can't do that.  <guest looks annoyed> Umm... it's highly illegal for you to take that togo.

Guest: Really??

 

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Guest: What is this charge?

Server: Well, when you ordered your dish I asked if you wanted to add this and you stated "Yes, just what it comes with"  Since you said you wanted it but I didn't come with it I clarified and you still said yes.

Guest: Well I didn't want to be charged for it.

Server: ...also most strawberry lemonade refills aren't free because the strawberries aren't cheap.

Guest: I wouldn't have ordered it if I knew that..

Server: <to himself: I know sir... I know>  Sigh...

 

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Guest: These wings are under cooked sir.

Server: Not to be rude, but those wings are definately cook.

Guest: I've been a cook for years and I know my food... these wings are still bloody.

Server: <laughing inside> You know, we get our wings like most people... there is no blood by the time we get it.

Guest: Well this is blood!

Server: That is bone marrow from where that particular wing was cooked a bit longer than it should be.

Guest: No, that is blood and it is undercooked.

Manager: That is marrow maam.  I'll cook another batch but that is definately marrow.

Guest: Whatever...

 

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Guest: What is calimari?

Server: ...Squid...

Guest:... oh... ok..

<time passes>

Guest: This chicken is not done.. far from done actually.

Server: Why do you say that? <server leans over plate and confirms the chicken is definately done>

Guest: It's not browned like it should be, and it is still milky..

Server: Well maam, we don't brown our chicken and that milky substance you pointed to, is butter.... like that over there.

Guest: Oh...

 

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Guest #1: Can I get a box?

Server: Sure! <returns with a box>

Guest #1: <proceeds to dump soupy beans and rice in the box>

Server: You want something that seals up like a bowl?

Guest #1: Nope!  This is just fine!

Guest #2: <to Guest #1> You are a dumbass... that will never make it home.

 

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Server: <surveys the table and sees 5 menus down but only two guests> Hey guys, how are you doing?  My name is "Hey You" and I'll be taking care of you today.  <drops down coasters in spots that are missing people as well as the two guests>  Can I start you out with a  Long Island Tea or maybe just an Iced Tea?

Guest: <looks at the server stupidly> Yeah, there are 3 more of us coming so...

Server: I figured with the 5 menus on the table... would you like a Dr. Pepper or a ice cold beer?

Guest: No, I don't want a drink... but I'll take a water.

Server: .... <mentally kills that guest for the sake of the world>

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Server: Would you care for a few more minutes to look over the menu?

Guest: We hate this place!!

Server: Umm.. ok.. what do you mean?

Guest: The cheapest item on the menu is $16... that stupid!  We hate this place!

Server: <thinks about the many items they have under $16>  Well we can do items a la carte...

Guest: No!  We are leaving...

Server: Let me get the check for the drink from the bar...

Guest: No!  I didn't like it either...

Server: <just looks past them at the empty first glass and the second one they wanted>

 

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Server: Besides butter and some sweet tea, is there anything else I can get for you?

Guest: Uh... I need some sweet tea and some butter.  <shakes glass at server>

Server: Already covered that... anything else?

 

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Guest: Can I get a sweet tea togo please? <hands over the check presenter after paid out>

Server: Sure, be right back!

Guest: <taking sweet tea> Thanks! Oh and don't forget your tips inside!

Server: That I won't forget! <shakes head while making shooting motion at head>

 

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Guest: <Looking at the table of waters with a single lemon in each one> I didn't order lemonade.  Am I supposed to make my own lemonade with these lemons??

 

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Server: <Looking inside check presenter> Did you need a few more minutes to take care of this?

Guest: I already paid it.

Server: You haven't given us any kind of payment <peeking back in book and snickering>

Guest: Well I signed that there reciept.

Server: Doesn't mean you have paid anything.... still need a credit card or some cash.

 

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Guest: Can we get more chip and salsa?  We have two more adults and three more kids coming...

Server: <surveys table noticing two full baskets of chips and five salsa for the two people there> Sure!  Soon as the rest arrive, no problem, we don't want it to get cold.

Guest: No... now is good.  they are parking.

Server:  Oh... right on... be right back.  <brings out third basket and 3 more salsas>

 

Thirty minutes later... the remaining guest show up...

 

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Guest:  It's my birthday!!  I want the whole restaurant over singing for me!

Server: <blankly stares at guest>

Guest:  Oh... and be real loud!!

Server: <blankly stares at guest then slowly looks around the restaurant that has only one other table taken because it is past closing time>  Sure! I got ya!

 

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Guest: What side items come with this salad?

Server: None... it is a salad.

Guest: Yes, but does it come with veggies or something?

Server: IT. IS. A. SALAD.  <walks away>

 

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Guest: Excuse me, where are your pastas listed at?  I can't seem to find them.

Server: This is a Mexican restaurant, they don't really have pasta...

Guest: Well... do you have burgers?

Server: Really?  No.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Guest: Do you have cinnamon rolls?

Server: <looks around at the cajun seafood references>  No.. I've got bread and some sugar?

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December 2 2013 1 02 /12 /December /2013 10:00

This is a list I'm keeping of my favorite tips from some of the best people in the world!  Some of you may think I'm hating by some of these... but I'm not.  If someone comes in and doens't tip me.. then I'm paying for them to eat partly.  Anything they leave me helps me get out of that part plus puts a few bucks in my pocket.  Some people just are great to wait on... like LaDamian Tomlinson... I waited on him once... didn't tip a dime but I can now say I waited on a Pro Baller from TCU.  I've waited on many celebs over the years and if they tip or don't.. I get a shake of their hand and I'm cool with that.

 

 

 

James Darrell Tipps and family were a real treat to my day.  The $11 on $107.57 with two free desserts we got you was awesome.  I really wish I could thank you again, and hope you have a great holiday!

 

Nathan C. Talley and Teodoro Gomez graced my presence the other night and I missed out on thanking them for the $5 on $50.72 and $5 on $37.08 after getting half off your food.  You guys were a real treat and it was a pleasure to wait on you again.

 

Theresa Hernandez and her server son came in and visited and it was a pleasure to take care of them.  Thank you for $2.18 on $25.82.  You guys were amazing!

 

Cody N. Harris saw a friend of mine and he was thrilled to have such good company to talk to that night.  I wanted to put a big heart felt thanks out there too and he will cherish those 5 Dora Dollars on $59.92!

 

Destiny L. Taylor was a blessing in disguise!  It is not often I'm surprised like that!  Thanks for the good times on $24.25!

 

Lisa D. Salazar was a special treat.. sadly she wasn't in for a long time but I appreciate the short time we had on $10.57.

 

Eufemia D. May and family made my night.  Their gracious attitude and kind hearted personality made my evening.  Thanks for the twenty spot also on $171.77!

 

Raul B. Martinez left me $4.00 on $56.46 and I was shocked... he and the person he was with were amazing to b.s. with and I thought the company for that hour was all I needed.  Thanks!

 

Cristina Belloc came in for a family event celebrating a birthday.  They were so much fun and I just wanted to thank them again for the $10 on $174.25!

 

Chasen Hale was awesome.  Such a special treat to take care of and I'm thankful for the $5.12 on $47.88!

 

Josh Sexton was a surprise from the get go.  Awesome guy... offered to hook up their server since they don't get commission... bought $2000 worth of Gift Cards!  That's something!  He was so cool they even got his $43 dollar tab taken care of!  Thanks for the $20 on $2043!  Go back and see that guy!

 

Clara S. Fraire I have no words for my greatfulness.  I learned some valuble lessons and knowledge from them so the $0 on $35.42 was a fair trade out.

 

Norman Walley and his family were a treat!  Thank you so much for the $10 on $101.38! Have a blessed day!

 

Michael Alexander was the guest of my night and I just wanted to thank him for the $7.22 on $67.78!  Come again!

 

Karen Willenborg and her daughter was awesome!  They were a thrill ride through and through!  Thanks for the $5.66 on $54.34!  Come see me soon!

 

Joshua Edwards left me $10 on $97.43 and left before I could personally thank them for their patronage, so thank you very very much!

 

Charlotte A. Bostick came in with friends and family and left me $10 on her portion of the tab at $95.91.  Happy Birthday Charlotte!

 

T.U. Gallagher was the coolest!  Thank you oh so very much for the $25 on $178.90!  Can't wait to help you again!

 

Nikki Cameron highlighted my day with $4.07 on $50.93 and I just wish I could have thanked her personally.

 

Erica Lasharda Choice proved to me my "cousins" are awesome!  Thank you Erica for the $4.00 on $71.07.. thank you so much!

 

Wesley Merle Brown left me $8.00 on $77.24 and I missed my opportunity to thank them.  Come back to visit and ask for me!

 

Pamela Yarger - $23.71 left $1.29 - Thanks Pamela!  Blessed to have served you!

Taylor Brown - $25 and left $5 - Thank you Taylor for tipping 20% but to whomever your friend was that left me 5cents on $47.. I'm extra thankful for them.

Qiana Myisha Mickens - $73.14 and left $2.00 - I'm Blessed beyond words!  Thank you lady I can't pronounce your name...

Angela P. Scott and her family of five - $27.50 tab for 5 is awesome and left $2.50 for me - Thank you so much I felt so good for taking care of your family!  Thanks! 

Sondra Light was so nice as to leave me $10.53 on $89.47.. Blessed to have served you.

Crissy A Bailey felt compelled to leave me such a great tip such as $3.00 on $45.52.. Thankful!  Thank you!

Ashley Nicole Bonilla was graceful enough to leave me $5 in cash on $45.03!  Thanks!

David W Reed was such a great person to me.  I'm graced by his $10 on $127.52 after he argued over getting the check from his friend.

Sheneka D Madison graced me with her presence and left me nothing on her tab.  Her glow was my reward.. thank you so much!

Cindy Hunter is a beautiful woman who's family graced me by leaving me $28.44 on $396.56..   for you... I'm thankful for your less than 10% because I feel awesome to have served you.

Diana M. Micking is a perfect angel of a woman that $2.00 on $73.14 is perfect for waiting on a woman of her class!  Thank you!

 

Carolina Contreras, by writing on the receipt that you "are broke and you are sorry" saddens my heart something like that happened to you.. We feel for you and we thank you for gracing us.

20130118 220654

 

Roderick Woods, you make my heart sing when I get the warm feeling of $0 on $48.04.. I am glad you let me pay for a portion of your ability to eat where I work!  Thank you!!

 

Norma Flores, you are the inspiration for me to continue to slave night after night in this business.. for $3.00 on $37.08.. if it weren't for you I would have ended it all long ago!  Thank you Thank you!

 

Kelli Austin, I was so thankful to be the one to take care of you.. and your gracious tip was too much for me.. $5.00 on $46.87... I shouldn't have accepted but you were already gone.

 

Justin Schroyer and family, it was a pleasure to wait on you and yours and I wish I could thank you personally for the $20.00 on $168.20 but alas I cannot.

 

Lynita Pierson and her family was a pleasure to wait on.  I was thankful to have them come in and stay after hours.  So greatful that the $0 on $70 made my night the best just because of their joyful presence.

 

Tracey D Gayle was the best.  Complimented me on being the best waiter she and hers had ever seen.  The $5 on $40.94 was proof of their belief!  Thank you Tracey! and

 

Leonesea Cato Jones believed it as well and I would like the thank her for the $6 on $54.36 as well.  Truly blessed to have you!

 

Justin W. Pacha and family was a blessing in disguise.. It was a pleasure to wait on you, your wife, and three children.. I will cherish the $5 in cash you left on $60.51 credit tab.. Thank you so very much!

 

Ashley V Meza and her entourage was a trip!  I had a great time with them and I just want to sincerely thank you for your $25 dollar cash tip on $294.15 tab.  Thanks!

 

Scott J Minich and his family were a dream to take care of.  I did enjoy my time waiting on them and the $10 that was left on $79.04 was special to me.  Thank you!

 

Jason Edward Duvall and his lady came and saw me the other day.  I was pleased to be of service and I do hope to see them again soon.  Thank you for the $5 on $55.47.. I took care of your friends too and they were also a pleasure!

 

Linda Soto and the entourage of loud interjecting people where a blessing to take care of.  My co-worker and I had a hell of a time your group for your friends birthday.  Thank you for your blessing of $95.28 that was supposed to be $100.. I felt part of the group since I had to kick in an extra $4.72 out of my own pocket to help.

 

Also part of that group was Karen Hernandez and she did my co-worker and I a solid with blessing us with $0 on $37.28, which again made us feel as part of that party!  The pleasure was ours!

 

On more shout out to that group is Diane Rodriguez who took the credit receipts on a $52.48 tab and only signed the bill.  The little bit of money out of my co-worker and my pocket put us very deep into the feeling of being a part of so and so's birthday!  Oh.. thanks for the cake.. I didn't eat it but it made my manager feel a part of the group too.

 

Vincent Banks was a blessing to serve along with his guests and I'm greatly appreciative of his $8.00 on $88.15.

 

Sean Isaac and his were a gift in human form and I sincerely feel great about the $6.00 on $72.09 and I would hope to see you again!

 

Leasha Crayton had a heart of pure gold... so pure I almost couldn't take her $1 on $20..

 

Angel L Landfair is another one of those perfect people that I feel so blessed to wait on.  I love the $1 on $32.63.. I will cherish that dollar.

 

Whomever Heo Painting is owned by, I want to thank your employee who made my night complete with $5 on $71.

 

Stephanie McFarland and her daughter visited me recently and I just want to say thanks for $3.98 on $56.02 and starting my night off in a bright note!

 

Anastasia Armstrong Hare blessed my co-worker with her exotic Russian name and her $2.03 on $23.97 after crossing out the gratuity that was higher.  You made a highlight of our day!

 

Michael Sura is a scholar and a gentlemen... your $4 on $49.15 is a great contribution to your worldliness.

 

Harold W Hawkins made my Easter with his family dining with me and the $12 I was left on $102 was a gift that keeps on giving.

 

Timothy Hubbard and Rachel M Saade came to visit me lately and devoured a mass amount of salsa and drank a lot of tea which they were never short of.  I proved my skills to them and they rewarded me greatly with a split tab of $2 on $20 and $2 on the other $20.  Thanks!

 

Luis M. Hernadez visited a friend of mine the other day and he told me how great he felt after waiting on those two people that it just made his day all the much better.  On his behalf he thanks you for $0 on $53.20 and I hope I'm blessed enough to have you one day!

 

Donnie Gonzales and I had a great talk about life and burgers... I love them.  He and his girl were a blast and I just want to thank him for the $8.00 on $80.57.

 

Ashley Whitney and her friends were fun to take care of.  I had a good interesting time with you ladies and I thank Ashley for the $2.00 on $22.57 and her friend who paid with a gift card and left $3.55 on $33.45 from the bottom of my heart.

 

Danny Barron and his family were a real treat.  It's like angels in disguise... $6.64 on $113.36 was straight from heaven.

 

C.S. McMenamy was a blessing in my life as well.  I had another great moment with this person and I would like to thank you also for the $4.00 on $34.34.  Thank you!

 

Christopher Dixon was another one of those people you just look at after they leave and just hope to see them again so you can thank them for their generosity.  Thank you Chris if I don't see you again for $3.67 on $34.33!

 

Daniel Adam and his girlfriend were fun to chat with.  I made your appetizer right in front of you and we talked about many topics.  I was so pleased to take care of the two of you and thanks for the $0 on $78.75 at the end of my night.  Blessed!

 

Mary Munoz I enjoyed to the utmost and I felt extremely happy and thankful for the $5.00 on $65.33.

 

David Love was another great man.  I talked with this guy and he shared some insight into some events going on in the world and I realized that I was gifted by his presence and so I'm thankful for the $10.00 on $88.01.

 

Nancy Hernandez was pretty cool.  I thought they were fun and I'm thankful for the $14.00 on $103.00.

 

Amanda Patterson and her husband with their child was definitely a blessing for me to wait on.  I must say I was pleased beyond my understanding with them and their $6.99 on $69.01 was a gift!

 

Sara S Rodriguez and her family gifted me with $10 on $103 with their friends Luiz F. Martinez. (See Below #9.)

 

R. Richardson was awesome.  Simply awesome!!  $4.00 on $44.60.. Awesome!  Thank you!

 

Lisa M. Ridgley came out with her husband for his birthday and we had a great little event for him and I want to thank you for the $10.00 on $82.89 after all the effort put in.  I feel over compensated.

 

Juan D. Solarzano was a blessing and I'd like to personally thank him for the $10.00 on $87.87!  Thank you!

 

Charles W. Gregory and you friend were the highlight to my day.  I felt so overwhelmingly happy and thankful I almost couldn't contain it.  The two of you I thank for the $0 on $22.14 and your friend for the $0 on $40.00.

 

Luther Mayfield III was pretty freaking cool.  I must say I had a blast with them.  The $6.00 on $51.97 might have been too much but I was thankful!

 

Jerry Branecky was the high point of my day.  The $2.83 on $38.17 was the tip top of my day and I thank people such as him everyday.  It inspires me.

 

Double L Trucking's employee or whomever they were in relation to them visited me with two kids and I had a blast joking around with them and even the kids were cool.  I think so highly of the world and of people when I got $5.00 on $68.96 and I thank you!

 

Kendra Odom and her crew came in and I felt extremely grateful for the $6.00 in cash on the $65.24.  It made my day.. almost my week!

 

Shelby N. Kell brightened my day considerably when she walked in the room.  It was a pleasure and a privilege to take care of her.  The $5 on $45 was just the perfect amount to add to my day!  Thank you!!!

 

Jamaica Collins and her sister Maria Collins visited me the other night and spent about 3 hours cutting up with me.  I enjoyed their company and their jibes.  I was a good time.. and I would like to thank them for the $3.23 on $31.77 and the $2.55 on $37.45 and I wish they would come back and see me!  Take care!

 

Bradley E Grant was the best!  I had so much fun taking care of this man that I wanted to refuse his money.  Sadly I only make $2.13 an hour so I couldn't afford to take that hit that night but I felt good for taking such great care of this man.  I want to thank you for the $0 on $47.. and if you had tipped I would have possibly not taken it because it was so great to meet you.

 

Raymond Valderas was a treat.  Him and his wife came in and chilled and were quite pleasant.  It was a bad night and the coolness of them just made my night seem better.  Thank you Ray for the $8 on $59.55.. I hope to see you again soon!

 

Abel Flores and his family came in... some cute kids he has.  Well behaved at that.  This family was fun yet very simple to manage.. even when I became a bit busy.  I relish tables like that and I am very thankful for the $10 on $92.61!  In cash too.. trying to help me dodge the IRS aren't ya?

 

Now Robert D Ureste was a treat of treats!  He took his family out.. all very cool people.  No problems just some bantering and laughs.  I talk about how I relish nice tables.. I love these types of tables.  I hope they come back and see me so I can thank them in person!  Thank you Rob for the $10 on $192.34!  Thank you very much!

 

Douglas Q Jackson was extra fun.  Just a old school good old time of joking around.  Bless him for being such a riot!  Bless you for $5 on $58.76.  Keep it cool and old school!

 

Vincent Banks... good old Mr. Banks.  I don't know what to say about this guy.  He was awesome.  His crew was awesome.  Had a blast!  It's people like this that add to my day... it is why I like doing what I do so I can talk to people with different mindsets and views.  Love it!  Thanks Vince for the $8 on $87.87!  It is appreciated!

 

Kimberly N Walker was a blessing in disguise.  I never saw it coming but her generosity made my night and I would appreciate personally thanking her for the $7.01 on $70.99.  Thank you!

 

Luis E Fierro came in for Father's Day and his wife and him was awesome to take care of.  Very chill and just a great experience for the both of us.  I appreciate you and your $4.00 on $43.08 very very much!

 

Gloria Gonzales and Samatha Lewellen took their father out for Father's Day.  It was such a nice gesture and they decided to split the check right down the middle between them.  At $62.24 per half I want to thank each of them for the $6.00 on that $62.24 and I feel good I could contribute my pens and the sweeteners on the table to your cause.  Please come back and see us, have a blessed day!

 

Stacey Valadez is a regular that always puts a smile on my face.  Last time I had the pleasure to wait on them it was a wonderful experience for me.  I just want to thank her for the $3.00 on $41.61... so Thank you Stacey!

 

Juan Morales-Perez was a blessing and such an easy guest to take care of.  Him and his was such a breeze it is like I didn't even work on his table.  The $0.00 left on $67.54 was perfect because if he had left me anything I would have crossed it out because it was so easy I didn't even feel like I was working.  Thanks for the smooth experience.

 

Homero Martinez was absolutely hilarious.  He was just a pleasure to wait on.  I don't think I could ask for better people to wait on than them.  The $0.00 on $57.53 was cool because I got so much more in the time spent talking to him than money could buy.  Thank you!

 

Irma A Bretado spent some time with us recently and I wanted to thank you for the time well spent and the experience I got out of it.  Thank you too for the $3.00 on $24.79!  We learned a lot about each other in those 2 hours I will not forget.

 

Mario Carlos and his family came in to celebrate his son's birthday.  I wanted to thank him for the $4.33 on $75.00 and also apologize because I was not told until after you had tabbed out by yourself that it was your son's birthday.  The kitchen was bogged down and it took 2 mins to make the dessert and that was too long for you.  My apologies and perhaps next year it will be better.

 

Tanner Patterson was a great person to know.  From the get go, they were fun to take care of.  I sincerely want to thank you for the $2.00 on $23.22 and wish to see you again.

 

Ann Banks left me $3.00 on $44.62 and she left before I could stop her to thank her.  One day I hope she knows how thankful I am!

 

Kyle S. Clark and his crew was a smooth easy ride.  Had a little fun with them, joked around, and all was well.  They had a great time just as myself and I thanked them sincerely for the $4.00 on $89.02.  Thanks Kyle!

 

Saul Perez and his family came in late night for a little family event.  I remember when my family used to do such things and so I gave them tip top service while remaining out of their way as much as possible.  He came and shook my hand and thanked me as I thanked him for the $15.00 on $157.67.  Thanks Saul

 

Courtney Boren and her family was a treat to wait on.  I had a slow night and nothing was going on but they were like a breath of fresh air.  Thank you for the $2.00 on $43.08 and I hope to catch you and your family out again!

 

Christi Dawn Ferguson was out with Courtney Boren and the fam and I didn't want to leave her out for taking such good care of me.  $5 on $86.76.  She got five on it.  Thank you so much CDF, you are outstanding!

 

S.N. Espinosa was a definate blast.  His family was pretty funny, laid back, and just cool all around.  I wanted to personally thank them for the $10 on $104.51 but they bounced out a bit too quick for me.

 

Kimberly Pyeatt ended up paying for the whole table and she was very adamant about doing so.  I just wanted to thank her infinately for the $15 on $121.79 the other night.  Thank you so much!

 

Juan D. Solorzano came into a friend of mine's section and had a lot of fun with him.  I just had to put up how awesome he was and to thank him for the $10 on $178.10 the other day.  Thank you from the bottom of both our hearts!

 

Betty Mayfield paid for the family's tab recently and I wanted to thank her for taking care of everything.  They were a ray of sunshine for my day.  I didn't catch the son and law's name but I would like to thank him for the $10 on $90 and hope to have you grace me with your presence again.

 

George R Fegan was cool as hell.  I knew I was in for a great time from the get go.  I wanted to thank him for the $4 on $36.24.  Thank you sir!

 

Patrick J Chavez  ... name like that says it all.  Awesome!  Thank you!  $6 on $50.73.  Thank you very much!

 

Marcos A Mendoza is another one of those good hearted people that make what I do a blessing in disguise.  Thank you sir for the $9 on $83.66!

 

Barry Jay Wilmoth was a treat.  He and his lady paid a visit and left my $0 on $49.25.  He took the wrong receipt and I imagine he left me something nice but it doesn't matter because they were awesome.  Thank you for the fun time!

 

Jessie L. Davis.  Nuff said... this lovely lady came in and was a sweet middle aged lady... one that makes you want to do some volunteer time at an old folks home.  She didn't leave anything for their server but I imagine by the glow on their servers face she was awesome.  Nothing like those other people that threw their check presenter at their servers.

 

Nihol Ong taught me a few things.  We discussed some differences in recipes and food choices... just an informative table.  I want to publicly thank him for the $74.09 tab with the $5.91 tip.  Thanks again!

 

Stephen D. Wilson came in for the special... and he was something special.  Cool as hell... full of fun and laughter... I just wanted to thank him for the smile he put on my face with the $4 on $39.92.  Thank you sir!

 

Troy L. Birkenholtz was a cool customer.  Thank you for the $8.08 on $61.92 and for the great company you provided to my section.

 

Edward Hernandez was the coolest I've had in a long time.  I appreciate the laughs and the $5 on $45.15.  Please come back and visit!

 

Ormon Whitehead and his were an informative table.  I shared some random facts with them and they enlightened me as well.  Thanks for the $5 on $80.62 and I hope you have more info for me on your next visit!

 

Michael J. Guillory visited a friend of mine elsewhere but my friend thought he needed an honorable mention since he and his family were so cool and respectful.  He stated he was an ideal guest and thanks him for the $5 on $121.11.

 

Michael Egan and his family were pretty funny.  Taking care of them was a treat for me and it was simple in a time of haste.  Thank you for the $10.81 on $97.19 and I hope you well!

 

Duane Griggs and his girl came in and went straight for the high dollar stuff.  My kinda guest... thank you for coming in and taking care of me, thanks for the $10 in cash on $101.97

 

Deon Jones was part of a large party that was very nice and patient with our newer staff.  Wanted to thank her along with everyone else... the $4.81 gratuity was apparently waived by the $0 tip left.. but she was a treasure to wait on.

 

Richard A. Beaty was pretty chill and I hope all is well with him.  $0 on $46 due to taking both the credit receipts is all good.  Come back in and we shall take excellent care of ya!

 

Denise Loa.  Awesome!  Cool chick!  $64.08...$4... Thank you very much!  Nuff Said ;)

 

Humberto Buendia was a nice guy that took care of the check for everyone and I didn't get a chance to thank him for the $3 on the card and $5 in cash on a $100.61 tab.  Thanks man, come back and see us!

 

Nancy R. Valiente did me a solid and I wanted to thank her for the $4 on $48.33 and invite her back to come and see me so I can thank her personally.

 

Corlitta M. Whatley visited us on our special %50 off night and I wanted to thank her for the excessive tipping I saw... thank you for restoring our faith in people with the $3.26 on $51.74.

 

Primitivo Aleman was a interesting man.  Aside from the name he was a mildly intense person and I wanted to thank him for his patronage but I missed my window.  Thank you Primo for $2.50 on $52.47!

 

Rosemary Arellano was an awesome guest!  I hope she comes back!  Thank you for the $5 on $57.59 and come again!

 

Elizabeth C. Rodriguez came in and I am proud to say I donated my nice pen to her good cause and also wanted to thank her for the $4 on $46.87.

 

Geneva Cruz came in with Elizabeth C. Rodriguez and I wanted to thank her too for the $4 on $41.41 and thank her for not donating another pen to someone's cause.

 

Camesha Perry's presence was enough for us.. her and her friend's presence.  Thanks to both of you for the $0 on $61.29 and the same on $74.66 from the friend.  Come and see us soon!

 

Tony A. Navarro came in for a small birthday party.  Everyone was cool and I enjoyed their presense.  Thank you Mr. Navarro for the $10 on $87.91!  and happy 82nd to Faye!

 

Arturo B. Medrano was a blast to take care of and next time I have a chance I would love to thank them for the $5 on $47.62.

 

R.A. Barker Soto was a very cool guy.  I had a blast joking with him.  Thank you sir for your patronage and thats it on $47.

 

Richard A. Berquist and his family were the coolest!  The $14 on $113.30 made my night so much better.  thank you Rich!

 

Lorin R. Stolz and company made me feel blessed and I wish to lay my blessing on them.  Thanks for the $5.50 on $54.50!

 

Lori S. Provence and family came in to see my buddy at work but he was off.  They were fun and easy to manage... thank you for the $4.00 on $49.34

 

Jonathan Clark and his brother James M. Clark were two treats that I can't wait to see again.  You guys were great.. thanks for the $3 on $26 and $2.50 on $26... You two were the coolest!

 

Harry O. Recinos and his partner were a fun loving couple that I can't wait to see again!  Thank you for the $3 on $42.54 and all the laughs!

 

Curtis S. Luper and fam was a blessing in disguise and I want to thank you for $10.65 on $85.35.  Thank you come again!

 

Jose Zapata and his wife were some cool cats and I wanted to thank them for the $2 in cash on $37.94

 

David A. Barkley came in with Herd Midkoff and I wanted to thank him for the good times and information and the $6 on $60.21!  Thank you!

 

 

Now truly great people I've listed below!  Thank you and keep on coming in!

 

Jason A. Lackey was a guest on a busy night as I was getting my ass kicked and he left me $15.00 on $53.26 which is super bad ass.. thank you very very much Jason!

 

Carl A Granger was so humble and I thank him for his gracing me with his presence and the $40.00 he left me on $160.  Thank you good sir!

 

J.M. Gardner is a great man.. not only did he leave me $6.00 on $34.48.. his presence enlightened my day. Plus the $15 extra in cash since the table next to him royally screwed me!  Awesome man!

 

Eric Wessinger and his family were a great table to server and I would sincerely thank them again for their $20.00 on $90.96 and welcome them back!

 

James S Piner and his family were a treat!  Loved every minute of them!  Their tab of $74.42 with $14.00 on the card and then $20.00 in cash.. KCCO friends!

 

Rod G Sanders came in with his wife and daughter and apparently were having a deep conversation with his child.  He looked up and noticed we were pretty much closed and paid up his tab of $36.97 and left $5 on the card.. and an extra $5 in cash.  Thank you sir!

 

Laura S Craig was a blessing in disguise being with her friend Jason Edward Duvall and I was extremely blessed to have her sharing that table with him and I felt humble to take her $10 on $35.36.. I'm unworthy..

 

Richard Black and his crew was fun and interactive and I felt graced by their gift of $32.36 on $132.64..  graced by your blessing sir.. thank you!

 

Dayanne Knight was very cool and I thank them for being a bit cooler than their friends with the $8 on $47.31.  I still thank your friends Charles W. Gregory and crew though. (See Above #52)

 

Ashley R Jones was such a treat and I would love to take care of you again.  The $20 on $83 was very welcomed and I am glad I had the pleasure to wait on you and yours.

 

Luiz F. Martinez came in with Sara S. Rodriguez (See Above #48) and I was very thankful for your generosity and the $10.00 on $54.49.

 

Ashley I McAfee, I would like to thank you for being a breathe of fresh air to a stagnant enviroment.  Thank you for the $11.54 on the card for you $57.69 Tab and then the extra $5.00 in cash!

 

Elaine Herrera and her crew were awesome to wait on.  One guest with her looked like a slim Ron Jeramy but he was cool.  Demanding but in the way of someone who knows what they want and how exactly.  Thank you slim Ron and Elaine, the $40 you left me on $165.21 made my night!

 

Randall Burks was paying it forward with me in the chive way!  Thank you brotha for the $20 on $28 and your friends were just as cool!  Thanks!  KCCO!

 

Mr. Brian W.  That all I got off your information so it is all I know you by.  Your lovely wife and kids came to visit me and I was honestly thrown back by how awesome you tipped me.  $10 on $28.52 when all you ordered was some teas and a single lunch plate.  Appreciate you!  Come again!

 

Aleathia Parrish and her daughter were quite funny.  Actually her daughter was hilarious... thank you Aleathia for the $15 cash on $45.03!

 

Michele Harmon came in on our %50 night and she adamantly wanted to pay the tab... I thank her and her family very much for the $30 on $65.65.  A breath of fresh air like that rarely happens.

 

Amy M. Yates-Garmatz and her family were an awesome table to have at the end of my night.  They turned my frown upside down and I want to thank them for the $20 on $51.20.  Thanks!

 

John D. Price and his family were the coolest!  The $21.53 on $78.47 started my night off in the perfect way!  Thank you Mr. Price!

 

Timothy Frank and family plus friends were the highlight of my day.  Hope you come in again and ask for me!  Thanks for the $80 on $287.85

 

Herd Midkoff came in with David A. Barkley and families and blessed me with a good time and $8.00 on $27.03.  Thank you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

#kcco

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November 7 2013 4 07 /11 /November /2013 20:52

http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n97/drifterz01/blog%20material/The-Customer-is-Always-Right-Sign.jpg

 

 

          This is a tried and true statement in the eyes of most businesses and for the most part I completely agree.  I will say though, that Kroger had a saying on their wall in the offices upstairs that I will never forget. 

 

 

“The customer is always right.”
“The customer may be mistaken.”
“The customer may be confused.”

 

 

 

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My insert


“The customer is an asshat.”

 

 

The first three lines were really on their office walls and it was one of the first things I saw when I started there in 1996.  Personally I follow this belief day in and day out in any kind of job I’ve ever had.

          First off, I’m a customer of many places so I want to think I am right all the time too.  Hell… I am right all the time.  I am the Law!  Anyways, there have been many of times through the years that I may have read an ad wrong, or mistook a sku # for a price tag (Spiderco Knife with a sku # of 1987 and I presumed it was the price and went to buy it.. It was $79.99).  I still paid that price because I wanted it and just because I misread the listing I wasn’t gonna back out and complain to the salesman.  I’ve ordered food that I have found not to my palette… I boxed it up, paid for it, and gave it away later.  I ordered it having read the menu and knowing what I was getting but I just didn’t like it.  I can’t understand people that will order something they have never tried and expect it to be taken off because they didn’t like it.  If the restaurant messed something up that is fine… but that isn’t the case most of the times…  Here is where the asshat part comes in.

 

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          The average person is easily confused because the average person is stupid.  A confused customer is sometimes embarrassed that they didn’t or couldn’t read the facts in front of them or they didn’t ask.  Examples include things such as: One day an oil change is %50 off… that day only.  Why do you think just because you confused Thursday for Wednesday that we are going to just make that exception and give it to you anyway?  It’s like coupons that have passed their expiration dates… it’s done… don’t complain to us you forgot or didn’t know.  It is on the coupon plain as day if you read it.  It is the same thing that restaurants won’t take multiple coupons for the same party.  Again, right there on the coupon, it isn’t the damn grocery store… asshat.  These people are self inflicting illiteracy on themselves… READ!

          The worse thing about people that come in and think the customer is always right is that they like to flaunt it in the face of the employees of said establishment.  What I like the most if when they ARE wrong… absolutely wrong and I prove it to them.  When they are proven wrong they tend to deflate like a balloon and that makes me happy.  As I’ve said so many times before… I am an asshole and I revel in it!  Seriously… if you think you know everything keep it to yourself because someone always knows more than you.

http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n97/drifterz01/blog%20material/refusal.jpg

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November 5 2013 2 05 /11 /November /2013 21:20

          Many of times I have found a person out there who is just a total jerk or complete asshole and nowadays I love to eviscerate them in words.  Let us start off with the bad part to me… this guy is a Texas Tech fan as I am and it makes me sad to have to mention him.  As many people know I am a writer for fun (at least for now) and a server/bartender for my main income.  I work at a restaurant that will not be named and its concept not mentioned either.

          One lovely evening a young man and his lady friend came in and sat in my friend’s section at his restaurant.  This lovely couple ordered a couple of beverages and an appetizer to start the evening off.  Everything seemed fine and dandy until his appetizer came out but yet nothing was said for the first 5 minutes.  Sadly the item ordered as it cools off gets thicker, and as the guest Juan complained about it doing so, my friend explained to him that the item is a thick item anyway.  The guest gets a little perturbed and my friend offers to get him another or change up the appetizer.  They guest states they don’t want another, just go with calamari.  His server dashes off to inform the manager of the item complaint and to get the new item out when dick wad follows server and proceeds to bitch at him to the manager.  The customer is always right, tons of attitude, yada yada yada…

          Mr. Alvarado Jr. continues to dog out my friend in front of a manager that he was trying to get everything fixed for the “dick wad” and so my friend was removed off the table.  Usual methodologies for managers that have no spine and support for their staff and then they of course pester my friend for the rest of the night about how to do his job.  Amusingly while this manager was in training they stated they sucked as a server so this is a blind leading the blind situation.

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October 26 2013 6 26 /10 /October /2013 21:16

http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n97/drifterz01/drunks.jpg

Must be TCU kids...

 

         I’ve dedicated articles to people in general being stupid and it is my opinion that most people are in fact… stupid.  Just mindless peons following a day to day schedule that only changes if they are led astray.  Sometimes being led astray might be the best thing for you… perhaps like Lemmings and led to a cliff.  My rant on this goes out to all the people who go out to restaurants or bars and order some alcoholic beverages.  There is a proper way to order drinks and I completely understand if you are young and new to doing this but you should learn quickly.  It is mostly the 25 and up people who amuse me the most… let me explain.

 

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That's not even my name... bro!


          When you go out in public… meaning not in your own or friend’s home do not expect your Strawberry Daiquiri to be as strong as you make your own.  When you or your friends make your drinks you can put as much alcohol as you want in them.  In restaurants and bars there is a recipe that is strictly adhered to or it will cost the bartender money out of pocket or their job.  Going to your waiter or bartender and saying “Hook me up bro!” or ordering a “Strong Island” (referencing Long Island Iced Teas) is a big no-no.  They don’t know you… if they did you wouldn’t have to ask… but since they don’t know you… order a double and pay up for it.

          On the rocks or frozen.  That should be an easy one.  I’ve had thirty year olds that when questioned if they want their Margarita on the rocks or frozen they get confused.  It was as though they thought (HA!  Them think… ludicrous) frozen would be a solid mass of Margarita that they would have to wait melt or possibly lick and that rocks would be served over some pebbles or perhaps a gritty slab of granite.  Also, since we are on Margaritas… order a Margarita, don’t order a “Lime Margarita.”  Even if you get a flavored Margarita in the end it still is lime flavored. 

 

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I think I know that girl all grown up...


          If you are becoming a drinker then you should probably learn about what you are putting inside your body.  Flavors, ingredients, mixers and such.  For some of you, Amaretto Sours are your thing but when you go out you get upset because you don’t get drunk on them and you end up spending a lot of money trying.  Here is why…  Amaretto is 20% alcohol.  If you go with the good stuff and get Amaretto Disaronno then you are getting 28%.  Relatively speaking average vodkas, rums, tequilas are all 40% so perhaps going with one of those would be better.  Same goes for the Midori sour drinkers… that stuff is weak!  The sweeter the liquor… the more likely and worse the hangover.  Oh, and if you order those last two drinks and are a male… turn in your man card and jump off a cliff too.

 

           Oh... as an add-on... It's rum and coke.. or vodka cranberry... not the mixer before drink like my cousins do. ;)

 

KCCO

 

PS Cousins hate me ;)

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October 10 2013 4 10 /10 /October /2013 20:11

          I’ve been in and out of the service industry for many years.  When I was 18 I quit a furniture store I worked for and the first place my older brother took me to was a restaurant.  Olive Garden hired me on the spot and though being a high school student, they easily worked around my school and JROTC schedule.  The money was great even though I didn’t get to work as much as others.  Since then I have been in and out and for the most part… I love it.  Now honestly, it has many pros and cons and here is what I have seen…

The Pros:

  • Quick, fast cash in hand
  • Flexible Hours
  • You can meet many new friends
  • Discounts on food and services
  • It’s physical (depends on the person)


          Most restaurants I’ve worked for were pretty lucrative in the long run.  I would work 4-6 hours and make $100 or more and be out.  If you break that down, that is $18+ and hour.  If you went out looking for a part time gig you would be kind of hard pressed to find one that pays so well.  Granted, you don’t always do that well every day.  You will have your down days…

          If you are a student, single parent, or have a day job… many restaurants will be happy to work around your schedule because in today’s industry, they tend to hire more part timers and less full timers.  Possibly and insurance thing I have heard but I’ve no confirmation as of yet.  If you are scheduled a shift that something either you need or want to do, it usually isn’t too hard to get covered.  Either you drop a twenty spot down or call in a favor if you have any.

          Many of my best friends over the years I have met in restaurants or bars.  It is where we hang out and bullshit with one another and it builds a camaraderie that binds you.  Now it is true, you may meet and have to interact with some total idiots but that is at any job.  Many restaurants have inter-store sports leagues that you can join in so you can meet even more people that share in our interests.

          A common benefit is the discounts.  Many restaurants (not all) will give you and a limited number of guests 25%-50% off any food you may order.  In the long run, this could save you a bit of money eating at work.  Also, big restaurants have thousands of employees so Corporations will give service industry discounts on their products to get more business.  Personally I get discounts on my cell phone service, gym memberships, and even buying computers direct.  There is a long list at most big restaurants for what you can get for cheap.

          This could be a pro or a con but to me I see it as a good thing.  Physical work is good in a restaurant.  One restaurant I worked at I had a pedometer on and after a busy Friday or Saturday night, I had walked 10 miles.  Along with the trays I carried I even had an upper body work out going on that I was getting paid to do.  This can easily save you money on gym memberships.


          This industry may not be a career option for you but as a job while in school, extra money job, or transitional job… it has its perks.  Now it also has its cons…

The Cons:

  • Bad Money Nights
  • Terrible Guests
  • Bad Management
  • Holiday Hours
  • Stupid Coworkers


          It is a reality that you will have nights where you will not make jack.  Unfortunately that is the way of the beast… many restaurant managers will try to take care of you when you have those bad nights by buying you dinner or giving you a better section on your next shift but it doesn’t always happen that way.  I’ve seen people come and go in a matter of a month simply because they don’t or can’t make money.  If you learn the seasons you can kind of gauge the when the money will come in.

          I’m a people person so I am pretty confident in my ability to handle just about any situation people might throw at me.  Unfortunately some people are just plain dicks and purposely antagonize people in the service industry.  You will learn at some point that there are people out there that know how to work the system and will complain about anything and everything for no other reason than to get things for free.  Corporations in the restaurant business will bend over backwards for these asinine people even when they are repeat customers that do it every time.  Bite your tongue and kill them slowly in your mind…

          If you have ever worked before, you are pretty sure that you know what a good manager and a bad manager is.  As a server, you think you can do their job so much better, but it isn’t as easy as it all seems.  There is a lot of paperwork involved, time management, early days and late nights, and also remember that shit rolls down hill.  That means that someone complains to Corporate, Corporate takes it out on the District Manager, then the General Manager, then the smaller managers.  When it reaches the “bottom” it isn’t pretty.  Many servers try their hand at management after graduating since they already had a tenure there… many times this is a terrible mistake.  Many should never have tried…

           If you have a family or just like to spend time with people on big holidays, be prepared to not spend at least half those doing what you want.  Many restaurants have forced days you are required to work… so this can really mess with your personal time.  Luckily most are closed on Christmas and Thanksgiving so at least you will have those.

          I said a pro earlier was meeting new people and making friends.  That also has a downside.  Restaurant managers are not always the best judge of character… and they will hire some dumb ass people sometimes that couldn’t find their way out of a wet paper sack.  These people will annoy you and you will want to wreck havoc on them but if done, it will make your job worse in the long run.  Leave it be, but be prepared for blockheads…

           Now these are what I see for pros and cons in the industry.  I have been in it now for about 15 years and I still love it but I do have a cynical side to it.  Hope this has been informative to the people who have never been in restaurant… and I hope it is amusing to the ones who have been or still are.

 

 

KCCO

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August 31 2013 6 31 /08 /August /2013 09:34

Restaurant Ediquette 101

 

          Just to be clear from the get-go this article is written with a lot of personal malice and emotion involved.  These are basic concepts that anyone and everyone should understand and follow without fail.  These are things such as manners, proper speech, and ability to read a menu.  I think that if you lack any one of these then you should stay your ass at home and order out.  If you lack any two, then you should be treated as a dog and castrated!  Sadly, if you are all three, it is sad your mother or father (if you even know who he is) didn’t smother you at birth, then kill themselves for bringing a worthless piece of shit into the world.  Let me break down those three abilities for the retarded people out there that should never breed…

 

           Manners!  A simple thing really.  Things like saying please, thank you and excuse me are prime easy examples.  Others include not interrupting someone else while they are speaking, grabbing them to get their attention, or shaking a glass at you while you are passing out food.  Now some of “you people” know how to say the “excuse me” but you don’t know how to use it.  Proper use does not include yelling it at someone while they are engaged with another person.  Quietly waiting till they are done is the correct way.  Also, to get the attention of a server or bartender, it is never appropriate to grab them.  Personally if you grab me, I will snap at you in a heartbeat because you have no reason or right to touch me. F.Y.I. you retards….  You know who you are.

 

          Proper speech!  I love this one.  If you are legitimately from another country (and no… just because you came from a huge continent over the sea 200 years ago does not constitute from another country) and have an accent, that is perfectly ok.  If you use a profuse amount of slang and need an interpreter then you should not eat at a sit down restaurant.  By the way for you guys that don’t know what profuse means… it means a lot up to extreme amounts.  If you can’t pronounce a word in the menu, either ask or attempt it so we can enlighten you.  Otherwise point at it and we will get you set up.  Please, for the love of your deity of choice, point to the right one!  This leads me to my next point….

Ability to read!  If you are an adult that can’t read, then go get help or kill yourself.  Do the world a favor.  Otherwise live out in the woods and do not procreate. So if you can read, please exercise that ability on the menu.  Understandably there still may be questions but some are completely asinine  either because the answer is on the menu ore using that lump of fleshy matter between your ears would answer it for you.  Examples are fun… so here are some…

 

  • What side items come with this salad?
  • Where are your pastas?  (Mexican Restaurant)
  • Ya’ll got burgers? (Mexican Restaurant)
  • What is “fil… et… mig… non?”  Is that a fish?

 

So all those people are morons… sad day and age we have to come to live in with people such as this roaming around.  Perhaps it is they that turn into zombies because they are pretty fucking mindless!

 

Now this last part is just some simple restaurant no-no’s for you pathetic people that do it…

 

  • Cirlce the pre-grat and tell the server I am only paying that amount and I am not tipping you..
  • Ask for every beverage price that we can possibly offer…
  • Put “cash” on the tip line and not tip
  • Not tip at all
  • Order drinks that you know you don’t or won’t like and expect it free…
  • Order a steak well done and complain it was over cooked after you at 4/5ths of it.
  • Dine and Dash

 

If you do any of the above.. then this last line is for you most definitely….

  • Breathe!

 

For the stupid…

 

Malice – desire to inflict harm, injury, or suffering on another

Castrated – to remove the testes or ovaries

F.Y.I. – Acronym for “For your information”

Acronym – a set of letters used to shorten a phrase by normally using the first letters of each word

Legitimately – to establish as lawfully born

Profuse – abundant; a great amount

Deity – a god or goddess

Procreate – have children

 

KCCO

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August 4 2013 7 04 /08 /August /2013 21:36

          Work safety is typically a subject that I've never had to put much thought into because computer and restaurant jobs aren't typically dangerous.  Now of course the possibility of slipping and falling on your dumb ass because of constantly wet floors of a food establishment is always and issue or lifting a box that is too heavy for you at an office job that displaces your weak back.  These are typical no brainer hazards to me.  Wear non-slip shoes and know what you can and cannot lift.  Easy kids!

 

          Now being in the service industry as long as I have been there are a few other dangers that you have to look into when choosing your job.  Location, location, location.  Being a server or a bartender, you tend to walk out the door of your establishment carrying cold hard cash.  Untraceable little green bills that one could easy stop you in the parking lot leaving and just flash a gun and take your money.  My advice... don't pick a restaurant or bar next to the "hood" and you have a much better chance of getting your nights earnings home or to the bank.

 

          Parking lot theft is a highly prevalent for the for the service industry.  So much so that all restaurants encourage their employees to leave in groups to prevent muggings.  Some places such as Hooters and Bone Daddy's make their staff come in and leave in street attire to sort of throw off would be muggers.  Stupidly the girls wear skanky little clothes that show they work there or just plain "Hey, I'm a slut clothes... get me in the parking lot!" type of clothes so oh well.  If they get mugged they probably deserve it in those cases.  Some restaurants apparently want to have their employees raped, mugged, and left for dead by enforcing dress code before you come in and after you leave.  It is like painting a target on your backs with a sign saying "cash on hand" to the thieves out there.

 

          Personally, I don't worry about thieves in parking lots too often because I am a large strong man that knows how to handle himself.  Also, I am very aware of my surroundings so it would be a bit difficult to get the drop on me.  If someone did and had a gun or a knife, my tactics of surrender or fight would depend on the distance between us.  If they get up close with a weapon there is a high likelihood I could disarm them.  I mean, I want my money and you can't have it fawkers!  I've been held up twice in my life and though neither experience was a pleasant one... neither yielded well for the one with the gun.

 

          Now for all of you servers and bartenders out there that read this... tell me how it is considered even remotely safe to have your staff walk half a mile to their cars at 10pm - 1am with security only at the start and the end of the half mile trek.  There is a half mile stretch of parking lots, buildings, river valley, and passing traffic for you to run the gauntlet through....  Would you do this?  I know some people that do... crazy...

 

 

 

KCCO

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